SEE YOU IN HEAVEN
Without you here I am really sad
I sometimes ask God and even get mad
Then I realize maybe it was meant to be
You are gone now and forever set free
Pictures of you remind me of good times
Either when dancing or singing corny rhymes
I hope you look down and know I am froze
Looking at your toothbrush or even your clothes
It will take time for me to move forward
Days will be longer and sometimes bored
I’ll gather my thoughts and know you’re okay
Dreaming I’ll see you later—or shall I pray
Stars
I look to the stars and speculate answers
Are we supposed to be the crabby ass cancers
The star that just fell took how long to fall
Are we just the size of a molecule ball
Compared to the galaxy that goes far beyond
How many more will I make a strong bond
Am I an angel chosen even before my birth
Or given a choice to live on Jupiter or earth
Did I know my mom many past lives ago
Does my nothing life have a lot more to show
Am I the way I am because that’s my mold
Can we live more freely than what we are told
Why under the stars makes me think of the such
Of me, myself and those within my reach and touch
Stiff
I really don’t know what’s on my agenda towards growing
I’m staying at flat line just constantly choking
I look down on myself and just can’t wake up from the dead
Even frozen at shock I just don’t flinch from the bed
Nurses and docs are complexed from the shock of death
There is no fighting at all from the very last breath
Feathered by dreams I return from crunching up teeth
Before I sink my own ship and drown under beneath
What exerts these odds I can’t explain at all
Not much turmoil could actually bring such downfall
I’m not a Jekyll and Hyde that goes here and there in thought
Or one in denial that’s getting mysteriously distraught
Who the hell knows where my marbles shall roll
Continue they’ll go in an everlasting spiral role
Take me out to the twilight zone
A place so fresh its your dream of the other side
So much you imagine on all walls of the wide
Dimensions of beyond you scatter hours throughout
Your own silent of difference doesn’t peep out a shout
Weirdness just comes and you dazzle old dreams in
Is this appropriate or going beyond borders of sin
Hazy faces go stared at for even minutes to hours
So much force there’s just numerous odd powers
Bridges of beyond go to undiscovered new places
Every smile I see has grounded bold faces
Focusing on the ground feels like clouds just beneath
Up in the trees are talking false teeth
Beneath the skin is tingle starting at the spine
This zone of indifference keeps more of incline
This twilight of lights gives only visions of mind
What you seek for your universe may be divine
The call
My one biggest fear is getting that call
Did they get in crash against a brick wall
Or stumble off a cliff way deep in the woods
Beat up or shot by some ghetto stoned hoods
When it does happen I’ve got to remember things
Let them go freely and give them their wings
And remember the good times that you’ve enjoyed
Holidays, birthdays and the cute way they annoyed
I know its weird to even fathom such thoughts
But scattered in my mind it does like tangled knots
To everything
To TV to movie
To child to teen
To job to career
To bus to car
To burglary to murder
To prejudice to hate
To poor to income
To try to accomplish
To lonely to date
To grow to mature
To taste to buffet
To lust to children
To reach to grab
To listen to dance
To love to marriage
To live to die
Tomorrow Seen
This isn’t the last time I’ll see you again
I’m not real sure of where or when
An image so lasting I know this for sure
This over feeling of beauty that’s naturally pure
An instinctive know that I’m eternally of essence
I’ll never be alone in my cease of existence
Weight of day
A clockwork of events we battle only time
Never row boating where pop turns to lime
Man goes so far before end catches forth
Where is the reason why we ended way north
A chore so repetitious can be insanely mad
In a perfect round world there will be bad
A crop of dirt provides a land of riches
We all have two factories set under our britches
Bugs seem forever lasting decades of torch
Why does everyone live side to side porch?
What is your calling?
We hardly ever seek the absolute truth
Like caving ourselves in a tiny phone booth
We seek much more than we have found
Giving into ‘what’s working’ just for right now
I say to you now do you enjoy your present
What can you do to change the unpleasant
Are you the person you don’t want to be
Clinging on another out of a desperate plea
Do you ache for more and pull out your hairs
Days can go by when you have absolutely no cares
You’ll stare at the wall just frozen for hours
You’d easily give anyone your extra powers
A certain something not there you really can’t find
Won’t even be found from a really strong mind
A matter of change involves a dare beyond your means
And ridding yourself of any or all weak fiends
What we’re capable of
Tomorrow I could sale my three daughters for cash
I could take out my rage and dangerously lash
Poison my neighbors dog because of the continuous bark
Escape the terrors of flesh eating shark
Run up some bills huger than the national debt
Break a woman’s heart so penniless she wept
Steal a car unknowingly killing passengers at rest
Escape realities of tradition seeking my own personal quest
Jump off the tallest bridge saying goodbye to blues
Solving the impossible when there’s very few clues
Athletes of gold with rewards of endless success
Record breaking gang bangs what an impressive mess
Balding hair from cancer with quadruple surgery to add
Go out of my box like eating something terribly bad
Be someone else for the mere stimuli of itself
Fake my way out of being a closet junkie shelf
Kill for the embodiment of my own sacred belief
Daring my peers knowing they want to fit in with grief
Nothings impossible since everything has been done
There’s really nowhere to hide and absolutely nowhere to run
Who is that in the mirror?
I look in the mirror and ask who is that?
This body I’m given is just a wee fat
But the face is soft and opens to most
Heavenly looks she was heavily dosed
No matter where she attracts with her charm
Waking up all like a buzzing alarm
Under this body what lies inside
In her own soul there’s something to hide
Is the mind in tact and fully aware
That there might be secrets she won’t even dare
To answer such goes beyond you or I
I’d really like to know I can not lie
Who was I before and where will I be?
Am I here for a purpose or is that for HE?
Am I watched over does anyone know?
I know when I was born but when will I go?
So many questions when I look in the mirror
Of when I am goofy or asking why the long tear
So much more I can sense from what I was given’
Gifted from birth I sure love the livin’
Who, what, when, why, where
Who: I am your conscious pulling your strings
What: can’t really say there’s so many things
When: the time is right folding a flush of kings
Why: thinking too much is a headache on my flings
Where: just go forward with instinct on gold rings
WHY ARE WE HERE?
Do we think under rage or under hate?
Can judging another be someone’s fate?
Are we who we are because of our will?
Are we so heartless we’ll kill for a mill?
Don’t we listen with our heart at the very end?
It’s so amazing what we’ll do- how far we will bend
Our earth is so big so why don’t we know?
Every meaning or small purpose sometimes hitting low
Many question no longer but just have calm peace
Enjoying small things like beautiful geese
Your own existence depends on knowing your mind
Deep way down who knows what you’ll find
Year 01
Back to day one of first year how crazy
Traveling time in RV- how fun but lazy
All go to the cave of time traveled space
Many pay thousands of this sudden boom taste
Yes I know we can’t see modern times again
It’ll all be worth it on day one of many men
Off to a new world of venturing new rain
Every nerve excited we shifted earth quick
Pushed into magma on our first day was sick
You there?
I often wonder where you are
Way close to me or gone away & afar
Do you miss our talks of secrets and laughs?
Or when we pushed over the baby calves
When we camped in the tent and talked
Forever until the stars faded and chalked
Laughing at the teacher who had five guts
Or the girl who danced like a regular klutz
I hope you think of me like I do of you
How much I cherish that you do have a clue
You made my days by just being there
No one gave us smack or really did dare
Your Last
What’s going to entail your last day alive
Wondering continues on this final arrive
Will you have brushed your teeth or even showered
Will you be courageous or a scaredy cat coward
Fast to the quick go or slowly reaching the end
What will you be doing and what’s your last spend
Are you going to be really old or really really young
Will it be a body part out like heart, liver or lung
It’s better not knowing the exact time you will go
Wandering as if a headless chicken that won’t really grow
After
Beneath my flesh lies a corpse of pasts
An inner light that always just lasts
It doesn’t gleam or light up at night
Not in the center- or the left or the right
Just there lurking and doing it’s job
Whether to help you or just make you rob
A mystery this is to many who ponder
Where shall it go when another I wander
Do I stay above and tell I’ve done well
Or do it all over with a mission in tell
Cancer faces
Just finding out you’re shocked with tears
Then forward on you have so many fears
You go back to crying thinking no, no, no!!
What could I have done different-- this is such a low blow
You realize your strength so you automatically just fight
On the back of your mind asking is this my last night
Sweating the chemo, the surgeries, the radiation- you say not too bad
Comforting your loved ones telling them don’t be too sad
The aftermath of it all you’re happy every new a.m.
Every past hardship you plan to patch all and amend
CONFUSION
i can not think i can not cry
all i ask is why? why? why?
unanswered questions make me think
why’d you wear that silly pink?
this was the day just for the dead
did all your feelings turn into bread?
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