Behind Doors
Outside you kind of pick up little things
about their personality waving because
they either like me or they’re cautious
hoping I’m not going to trash their place
one day or tell terrible rumors about them
I’ve never really went over there and talked
to them because I’m a big caved turtle with my
head cut off practically with zero talking
skills or even an ability to not sweat like a
cow sitting in one area for even a short time
Secretly I’m wondering if their problems
are minimal compared to my struggling
five hundred bills, fighting again with my
husband, my silly addictions or the fact
that yet another bad day in my small brain
Do they keep their house nice and clean, or
a little more laid back than me who gets
really annoyed by the dust, a seed on the
carpet, funky smells or bugs on the
window sill driving me crazy till I clean up
Yeah I wonder what goes on in their home
behind the closed doors of my neighbors
I wonder if they wonder like I do and if
they’d like to come over here like I’d like to
go over there just to chit chat and laugh
The Building Bridge
When you try to teach your young ones
Morals you always have to remember
What you were taught as a child
Dinner table manners, social manners,
School manners, meeting someone new,
Typical all day type of manners
Not everyone has etiquette but you can
Keep the bridge going by spreading these
Manners so your kids can keep building
A building bridge in social correct behaviors
Isn’t a discovery science show needing to be
Learned but a continual practice implanted
You have to keep in mind some bridges were
Never built and never implanted but you
Can hopefully infect others with your bridge
Outcast
Couldn’t help but want to include
them in everything even when
others will yell at me for
doing so
It was so they’re included and
not felt left out- because it
hurts me if they feel lonely
or sad
That anger really isn’t
toughness but a pain I
can’t describe or feel
really
I see it as it is and I want
to feel part of everyone and
not some outcast no one
Wants
Pear
perhaps the hardest thing
was my child lonely on the
playground all by himself
I could never tell him it’s
okay that children can be
really mean
to see him so sad was making
me sad
a hidden fear as a mom is
me smothering him with love
tender to the core is the
bruised pear that fell quicker
than the other pears
I wish I could have kept
him in my arms forever
singing silly lullabies
Playground
Fell off the monkey bars of
too many fights falling
on the feet again
Hung upside down wishing
their faces weren’t
upside down
Slid down the slide with
a few behind me
but they pushed
Swung on the swing with
the brains needing
to go higher
But that teeter totter
sitting on there
hoping for a real friend
Reputation
Damnit man don’t embarrass me
A character I act yes that shall it be
Now you’ve done it they’ve seen me as an ass
One of them losers a nobody low class
I’m not like you or ever will be
A bail of surprises that shine fully glee
Most of my esteem is low much of the time that is
Frightened I become when the spotlight becomes frizz
SHE RE-AWAKES
Alone at the corner she sat for many Mays
Everyone comes to visit but no one stays
Her homemade cookies her warm cute cat
Was nothing more than the front door mat
She joined new clubs and opened up doors
She let acid go and away with the pores
Helped build a community day by day
Parents took her kids there just for play
No longer in the house does she wish and stare
But loves every moment with concern and care
Soar to Roar
Unzip your zipper of character you
Releasing inhibitions of all you knew
Throw down the towel this isn’t your fight
There’ll be many others standing out of your spotlight
Run under fire and chant amen’s to the God
Pamper your neighbors with a breaded fish rod
Shove the gauge in your ear getting twice as much air
Paint yourself silly like the twin Amazon pair
Two faced I am
I gave in to the turning world
Turned to potatoes- French fried curled
I wanted power and hurt the clams
Flooding the river and blowing up dams
I spoke in new tongue forgetting my roots
Walked in new lifestyles with different styled boots
I’m a liar to myself and give no pleasure to minds
Now I’m prudish and seek different new kinds
I’m a joke to others and even desperately lame
Back to where I was, exactly the same
Needy and clingy, I want any kind of hope
Attacking my misery by destroying conceit with cope
A friend ignored
I wanted to be there when he wanted me the most
I cried at his going and felt I wasn’t their boast
I shed my shame because I didn’t take time
See their frustrations at the drop of a dime
I instead ignored when my friend was there
Who searched for trust and my true care
How could I know when myself was lost
Backstabbed, manipulated and double crossed
Now he hates me and not even my friend
I don’t understand and why we couldn’t amend
Maybe it was meant to be just this way
Where we’ll let go of immaturity and stray
To more mature friends who always go on
Expecting little from the wave of a wand
A friend you are not
I came to you when I needed you most
But you turned away when I needed that boast
I can’t forgive you cuz I was in pain
My heart sunk deep in mud and rain
My world was black and getting small
And all you gave me was a cold shouldered wall
This isn’t new cuz you’ve done wrong before
Using my wealth like I’m some freakin’ rich store
You fake ur friendship like you fake your smile
When at first I thought u were pretty cool for awhile
Then you abused a bond that once was deep
Forgetting the truth in endless long sleep
Now I’m free of your backstabbing ways
Once blind before when I had those dark days
Be gone forever and don’t try to phone
Or asking for something like a ten dollar loan
A Good Friend
I’ll always admire our real tight click
We’re like two peas in a pod or two cherries on a stick
Our same sense of likes drives me off my feet
Gawd how I’m lucky we were ever to join and meet
Many admire our friendship cuz they lack no common spark
It’s just that they are different and not that they’re a bark
Next time when you’re thinking of me--my truly good pal
Sending out my brainwaves of shopping and talking I shall
A LADY SHE IS
so funny and alive she lifts up the room
her aura is striking bringing a beautiful gloom
she laughs with confidence and speaks with class
people gather in groups or in a big mass
a true gift she has to touch so many lives
to get great appreciation, she digs deep and dives
a lady she’ll stay with elegance so high
she’s charismatic and powerful -- no one will deny
Availability
Her show is on, yet again.
Caught her while she napped,
Cell phone messages- oh I can
get back to you
I better get going to work
My friend and I are going
to the movies
Busy, I’m up to here in
errands- oh my!
Never could keep up with her
busy schedule
Just wanted to talk, small
chit chat- but you held
back your availability
with your TV, games,
internet, work, computer
and supposed friends that
are actually tricksters
BAD DAYS HAPPEN
at days i have this urge to hate
nothing goes right, you’re angry at your mate
I squeeze my hands tight- I barely could swallow
my madness goes insane- I’m nice to complete hollow
anything against me only flares me up more
see what happens if you call me bitch or whore
let me punch you out to shut your fat face
no wonder your mom thinks you’re such a disgrace
don’t take it personal, I have my bad days
I hate, I love you, my conscious always strays
Be Nice
I don’t care you’ve been struck with disease
Be nice
I don’t care you’re in need of a drink
Be nice
I don’t care you’re completely cranked out
Be nice
I don’t care you’re poor and homeless
Be nice
I don’t care you’re emotionally abused
Be nice
I don’t care you’ve been discriminated against
Be nice
I don’t care you’re sexually frustrated
Be nice
I don’t care you’re ugly or beautiful
Be nice
I don’t care you’re lonely and tempered
Be nice
I don’t care you’re short and tempered
Be nice
I don’t care you’re picked on all the time
Be nice
I don’t care you’re uncaring
Be nice
Beautiful spirit
There are ladies and gentlemen still out there
An ability to sift them is an ability to care
You notice their softness with just their smile
Or even their warmth glittering all worthwhile
You want to be around them most all of the time
Any wrong doing against them is such a crime
A hug is authentic you know its only with heart
Emptiness you feel when long days you’re apart
Magnetically you’re drawn to beautiful spirits like you
Good Lord knows there’s only a genuine few
BEING MEAN HURTS
My tears of guilt make me hurt
It’s only my own fault I shoulda threw down my shirt
I only make it worse by saying not a peep
But a strong sound behind me gives me a real big beep
I cry in pain for being super mean
Knowing much later I’ll feel like a monstrous fiend
I think over everything and realize I was wrong
Don’t get angry over anything-- Just get over it and be strong
Black
I’m not a slave that’ll do your work
I won’t be there just wanting to lurk
We’re a history of people that always have fought
Once betrayed by the government sold and bought
We’re proud of our heritage and seek the bell
Same liberty as everyone avoiding chaos and hell
We muster up courage by our knowledge and power
Shooting guns and in jail won’t make us tower
Our only difference is our Hershey dark skin
Often mistakened that we had no ends to begin
We’re not all on welfare and have HIV
Living in the ghetto listening to Snoop and Master P
Neither do we all have afros or big wangs
Running crack and whores always starting huge gangs
We’re actors, singers, politicians and even ball players
Just trying to make it like all the haters
Next black person you see don’t seem them as black
But just another person paying taxes fighting back
Cellular phone
I call my friend in need of cheer
Send her right over with a case of beer
All night she tells her beau she’ll be gone
Because this friendship needs a new love bond
We’ll complain about men and how they suck
Remembering we go home to one- oh such luck
Tell her your life puzzle piece by piece
Then passing out waking to more beer and chip grease
Club everyone
An ageless club where everyone just talks
Thousands come weekly down to children, parents, jocks
Everyone brings food its all up to them
Word of mouth started by only a stem
What might you ask brought this peaceful unite
Only stronger communities who all demanded no fight
A dollar at the door helps the poorest in the club
No memberships required but only eating fun grub
Everyone’s all level there’s no upper or no lower
Arrogance, stupidity or meanness is shoved right out the door
Games for everyone are constantly explored
A place like this possible would bring many a floored
Congrats!
I stumped on your day by getting you down
Making you feel like a jackass or dumb foolish clown
You were heightened with desire but especially by me
Never have I experienced such attentive glitzy
I admit I get jealous but just won’t admit
Instead I get psycho and throw a mad fit
Quite frankly I’m glad and truly do care
That you’d share your happiness with decorative share
I shall not repeat my little cycle of fear
But sharing the excitement with a six pack of beer
Whatever it may be I’ll be on your side
Even helping you like I’m some helpful guide
Corpse personality
In that brain of yours is a lifeless scale of personality alive
Pleasing the public is a selfish mode of being restless arrive
Traveling in circles without stops here and there can suck
Below the bridges are mysteries of shallow waters and duck
Open your meadows to more than zoned in parameters of bore
Embellishing your biography of chuckled dance fork lore
You’re not going to be the topic at the church judge meeting
There’s no such thing as being over silly with nervous heating
Bloom with the spring uplifting your mature playful ways
Once living in terror we can now bury the suspicious dull delays
Forget them
Who says they’re uglier? --you’re no saint of all beauty seen
Who says they’re fatter? --you’re no saint of all skinny bean
Who says they’re dumber? --you’re no saint of all smart jacks
Who says they’re slower? --you’re no saint of all quick sacks
Who says they’re poorer? --you’re no saint of all rich kings
Who says they’re weirder? --you’re no saint of all normal dings
They are more comfortable than you ever will see
They grasp so much more than you witness to be
They listen more carefully with even a heart to the ear
They tuck in themselves to anyone remotely close or near
They’re not your problem so just move on with yourself
No connection you’ll seek so forget them and remain the elf
GAVE UP MY CHILD
sometimes when a bonds broke by force
the power behind it could be stronger than a horse
broken apart and likely never to be found
my sadness for my loved one sheds another pound
hopefully by fate we’ll catch any moment spent
taking away this dark hole, which left a huge sad dent
if by chance you read this, know I forever cared
many days went really long, finding you was something I sweared
for some strange reason I knew you grew up okay
that’s what I want to think, stamped in my mind it’ll stay
Gibberish
Unconcern for others they only speak on their half
When in pain they’ll sarcastically just laugh
You wonder at all if they function with the world
Surprised you think when you see not a tooth is pulled
Snoopy comes to mind when a world of theirs is spoken
Gibberish of mumbles that are pieces all broken
Guarded
Continual flags up keeping up this paranoid fear
Do I feel like everybody or do I feel like nothing here
Bombarded by people I drown in painless head fright
Where are these delusions of eyes piercing my own light
Why can’t I smile wondering what you think of thyself sharp
There’s no musical charm to a broken melody harp
Charming to few does my anxiety hold me back so
Heart racing fast when around others in this fanciful show
Down under in pain I’m my own personal fear of social stress
Missing out in the public of the worlds humanity mess
I read others well
I am a poet and write from thy heart
I’m by far a genius but pretty damn smart
I can sense people- either here or just there
Conversations are limited to those I don’t dare
Minds are insightful but little really do read
The title of others or the stories of much plead
You know they have thought but only poison comes out
There’s so much drainage in their head with only one route
I only attempt for others I truly do love and care
It’s only drama 101 and a fake mask I wear
I’m tickled all over when another’s pretty level
But never criticize because I’m by far the devil
Intentions
Quite simply knowing every single
person and their habits is rather
impossible
We’re all raised differently with
endless types of personalities and
moods
Many mean well because they know
how cruel the world can be and just
want to help really
Its not that they’re cruel but
their intentions were to help
you out
They didn’t say quit eating so much
because you’re disgusting but to be
healthy
They didn’t’ say it all to be mean
but to help you out in a small
way
Next time don’t take it as a
cruel comment but as a helping
guide
Always with good intentions
Interpretations
when one gives themselves it
shouldn’t be all one person
it should be broken down
into many pieces for all
giving it to one person you
don’t get the full story
if you give to many you’ll
have endless interpretations
Money doctor, caring doctor
Disease ignored I cried for my health
Was my doctors concern only money and wealth
Felt like a patient but only their next pay check
Health cares downhill I scream what the heck!
Hope turned to fear what could I ever do
Asking years back when I had no clue
Today I’m alive thanks to doctors like you my hero
Who really give a damn and not concerned for another fiero
Nervous tick
Aunt Betty had a weird
thing about her in
public that was crazy-
For this reason, I’d go
pick her up every
single Wednesday for lunch-
I’d always be early
because the public and
her was torture alone-
Anywho, she’d tap her
two front teeth constantly
and humm amazing grace-
Spent my whole life
making up pretend
relatives and weird
things about them-
My made up family
is better than no
family at all
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